| XBK Chat (unofficial archive) A meeting place for past members of Brahma Kumaris
FAQ Search Memberlist Usergroups
Profile You have no new messages Log out
The need to belong
| XBK Chat Forum Index -> XBK discussions
View previous topic :: View next topic
Author | Message
--- | ---
Atma Joined: 26 Feb 2004 Posts: 98 |
Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2004 11:11 pm Post subject: The need to belong |
Initially, I was going to title this topic "The attraction of the cult". Then I thought I would put it in more positive - and broader - terms. Hence, "The need to belong". That is a deep and fundamental human need: the need to belong to something larger than the self, larger than one's immediate family. In short, the need to identify with and experience a sense of belonging to a community. Many have noted that this need is often the "bait" cults use to lure so many broken souls into their web. In post industrial revolution society, where many are alienated because of the "rat race" and impersonal realities, people experience a pleasant "break" from that alienation in the group scene that the cult provides. Suddenly, a warm fuzzy world opens up. A world of like minded "family". And all, apparently, having the same goals and the same path to get to those goals. This oasis of kinship and belonging is also a great relief for those who find themselves marginalized immigrants in host societies. In the BK path, the concepts of "community" and "home" are seductively amplified. "Community" is a loving (although detached) and pure "divine family". A family of elevated swans. And "home" has multiple layers. There is the ultimate "home": the soul world - a world of sweet peace and (orange?) light. Then there is "home" in the cyclic sense: the fabulous Golden Age. The time of divine Kings and Queens, flying vehicles, golden palaces, multicoloured lights, frolicking animals and musical birds, flowing streams of milk and honey, etc. Then there is home in terms of geography: India - eternal Bharat....the golden sparrow...specifically, the capital Delhi or, to be more accurate, Indraprastha, the Court of Indra. Even though heaven is heavily hyped for its wealth and gadgets, I suspect that for many - probably Westerners moreso - the main attraction is the thought of men, women, children (and even animals!) living in sweet harmony. Never a fight. Never a fall. Never a bruise. Never angry words. Never "Not tonight dear, I have a headache". And then......the bubble bursts.
gyaniwasi Joined: 22 Feb 2004 Posts: 167 |
Posted: Sat Jul 24, 2004 5:42 pm Post subject: |
Great post Atma! Good perspective. I'll come back to it later. _________________ "Those were the days my friend ...."
hanuman Joined: 23 Jun 2004 Posts: 174 |
Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2004 2:42 am Post subject: The need to belong |
Atma, You are discussing a very fundamental idea that is dear to humans and sub-human animals which have social systems. For the humans and sub-human animals, there are three basic pillars in the group relationship. These three are also expolited in recruiting gang members. They are: capable, contributing and connected. THE 3C The Raj yogi should have a clear understanding with SB about their capabilities and be realistic about their powers to invoke their potential and other talents for self service and world service. The capabilities need to be nurtured. Sinister seniors can manupulate this component of a Raj yogi to keep the soul down. The senior can use the class discussions and reading the murlis to personally attack specific students' talents. The students can then buy into the maya that their talents in writing are not good or they will never be able to bring under control storms of negative karmas. The teacher may tell tragic stories from the Indian folklore of individuals on the spiritual path not succeeding. A student who is well grounded in their capabilities will NEVER BE SHAKEN OR STIRRED BY THE STONES THROWN BY TEACHERS WHO PERSONALLY ATTACK OTHERS DUE TO A CLASH OF SANSKARS. Even as a Raj yogi, we should still maintain a healthy relationship with our lokik folks while connected to Baap-Dada and the Brahmin family. Some times, Bks will try to manipulate the contribution component as a means of control. The student is not given many opportunities for service. Or Their contributions are trivilized. The student, if body conscious feels they as gyanis are not high caliber souls. In THE SUB-CULTURE of the BKS, a Raj Yogi should always maintain full control in SB's Company of these three attributes. _________________ Om Shanti, To my brothers and sisters. Love to you all, Errol bhai
Tete Joined: 26 Jan 2005 Posts: 169 |
Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 10:18 pm Post subject: The need to belong.....or missing belonging |
Atma, This rang bells with me as my husband and I have been having discussions about who within our group of friends is spiritual. Not that they belong to any particular religion but rather seek to do good for the greater good of humanity. Atma,
Quote:
That is a deep and fundamental human need: the need to belong to something larger than the self, larger than one's immediate family. In short, the need to identify with and experience a sense of belonging to a community.
As said before one of the things he misses is the sense of community, like minds, working towards a common goal and the friendships developed over time. I truly think he misses "belonging". Filling that void takes many turns, projects, memberships, hobbies and volunteer work in our case. Yet, he seems to miss the mental exercises the most I suspect and what I have termed the "pure of heart state" of those seeking GOD to commune with. Your thoughts and Gy's would be most welcomed. Mr. Green and Primal.Logic could you comment as I suspect you have not been out for as long a period for a different perspective. Regards, Tete
gyaniwasi Joined: 22 Feb 2004 Posts: 167 |
Posted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 11:53 am Post subject: |
Thanks for raising this point again Tete. I see I never did get back to it as promised. It is a very crucial point in the life of an xbk. I recall meeting in two's and three's after leaving to discuss our departure and a way forward. The thing is, life as a BK in the West is like living in the Himalayas while being physically rooted in an entirely different physical environment. And practising "remembrance" while engaging in daily activities might have given a certain ability to cope with the daily stresses of life but it also disconnected us from the human world and human fellowship - including our immediate 'lokik' family. The daily immersion in "knowledge" left us in an ethereal realm of existence (the world of the "double foreigner") so that the only true fellowship one could experience is with those who shared the same knowledge, hopes and vision. It is essentially similar to any religious organization. However, whereas, some religions teach the application of their spirituality to genuinely engage the world in a process of transformation for all the practice in BK culture is to serve humanity on the premise that the majority cannot truly be saved, thus creating a class distinction - and consequently prejudice - against most of the human population. Contrast this with the kind of humanitarian work and vision of a Mother Teresa. In RY, belonging is not based on the premise set by one like the Christ spirit - where two or three are gathered, there I am - but rather on a spirit of elitism nurtured by a specific body of knowledge that does not 'fit into the intellect' of the majority. If, on the other hand, we practice looking for and bonding with the best in people we meet, regardless of religious affiliation, race, colour, nationality, or class, then we can begin to experience the fellowship we so dearly miss. We create a vision across division. This reminds me of a few lines from a song on the album "Diamond Harbour":
Quote:
In all men there is a space, for which the outside world has had no place; so in order to survive every day, we simply hide away our innocence of spirit, the very thing that feeds our dreams ...
It would seem that what is required of us is to be sensitive to that "space" in the people we meet in everyday life so that true spiritual communion can be nurtured. Reminds me of Oprah Winfrey's thrust of "Remembering the Spirit". No, because of our experience, we might never again have that regular physical meeting place or "Satsang" but instead must learn to cultivate it daily through a meeting of spirits even in a look, a touch or a word ... Gy _________________ "Those were the days my friend ...."
Tete Joined: 26 Jan 2005 Posts: 169 |
Posted: Sat Apr 01, 2006 1:18 pm Post subject: The need to belong |
Gy, This is so true to me in what I would see them (XBKs) do:
Quote:
I recall meeting in two's and three's after leaving to discuss our departure and a way forward. The thing is, life as a BK in the West is like living in the Himalayas while being physically rooted in an entirely different physical environment. And practicing "remembrance" while engaging in daily activities might have given a certain ability to cope with the daily stresses of life but it also disconnected us from the human world and human fellowship - including our immediate 'lokik' family. The daily immersion in "knowledge" left us in an ethereal realm of existence (the world of the "double foreigner") so that the only true fellowship one could experience is with those who shared the same knowledge, hopes and vision.
I remember my friends asking about his chats (we did not understand them ) and about the androgynous thing. What helped me was reading and listening to tapes by Dr. Leo Buscaglia on the basis of the Art of Being Fully Human. In essence if you love some one accept their little issues and reverse it. "Oh isn't he special!" When posed with the on-going question I would say "Oh he is ethereal", “On a religious realm!" No one ever said any thing much after that as I had changed it to "Oh isn't he special!" And life moved on. I am so glad you understand this as it can be quite a little journey in loving one of you XBK folks. Recently my friend said, "Do you remember when he was so ethereal"? I said do I....as most folks don't know that some times the gears slip and it goes into reverse (revisit). He can get etheral on occasion. Oh, and not to worry I have my issues to: My desk looks like a mess most times, only no one is allowed to touch it. He says, "She's got some method of finding every thing in there." Well, most of the time as I recently had to have some one come in to help me find a payroll report. Can you believe it I had put it where it was meant to go. No wonder I couldn't find it! It was in the to do file and not on my desk! My point is I recognize "I am special too". I still keep Dr. Leo Buscaglia's tape in my car and on occasion I will listen to it....as it helps me to focus on the big picture of life. We are all humans with frailties and in need of LOVE. Regards, Tete
Display posts from previous:
| XBK Chat Forum Index -> XBK discussions | All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Page 1 of 1
| You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group