Bansy wrote:I am told BKs do not hug BKs (at least in public), though in public hugging tends to be from a more senior BK to a junior BK. Are PBKs allowed to hug other PBKs in public ?
I like hugs that are spontaneous, that can catch you off guard. A few months ago I hugged my ex partner. It was after a split due to advanced knowledge.
We'd seen each other 2-3 times a year if that over aperiod of about 5 years. The minimal amount of contact was more from my part, so we could both move on into our 'new' lives apart from each other, ie to avoid messy complications. My ex turned up uninvited on my day of departure from the area, with a present for one of my relatives. There was a deal of activity (moving house) so conversation was limited and mostly impersonal. However when my ex was ready to leave we went quietly to one side to say goodbye. I guess there was no doubt that a hug was going to take place, it was only natural that we did so. It is all the subtle feelings and intentions behind the action that convey its meaning. This hug represented a kind of closure on an era. For the past few years we had been apart, living separate lives but living relativly close, (only 5-6 miles away from each other). Occasionally news of what the other was doing would journey accross the grapevine through mutual friends. There had been no overt need to contact one another on a regular basis. Just an occasional coffee in town/chat by the fountain. So, back to the hug.
At first it was just 'OK, thx for coming/nice to see u/ quick step in/arms around/heads on each others shoulder/body squeeze/not too tight/OK bye/smile/ cu later sometime/nice one'. But then just before disengaging the hug evolved, into something more.... it became a point of focus, a highly charged exchange of feelings and dare I say the V word. Vibrations.
Yes, deep.. warm ..melting.. comfortable... friendly..loving..easy, barriers down open hearted hug. Now this is where the danger lies. When I can feel every bone in my ex's body start to melt, when I can feel ourselves both relaxing and tightning the grip we have on each other for the benefit of mutual happpiness and pleasure. A moment of the realisation of an ending and new possibilities for the future. A moment which says 'Hey! I am done with the past. I like you and I like you a lot. I really wish you well. Its been tough but its worth it, just to get to this point. There is a saying 'Quit while you're ahead'. A very wise saying too. If you can manage to realise the situation that is. This is a moment when years of training in body/mind/spiritual development come to play a part.. How to see beyond the moment of desire/passion. How to disentangle oneself from everthing and still play an interesting and usefull role that is both self fullfilling and helpful to others. A role that brings a unique perspective into reality, so past, present, future become a totality, not half understood fragments .' Finish everything ahead of time'. Thats what the main man says. Does He not. 'Remain pure whilst living in the household. is not it' ? As one thing comes to a conclusion another thing emerges. And so The Cycle spins.
This is the feeling and meaning I have with the majority of my friends, family, and connections. Real life situatons for real life yogis. I feel there is allways something in the air between us. A good thing.
'There's a natural mystic flowing through the air..'..
I personally havent hugged Baba physically. Upon taking leave one time in Delhi it seemed one English bro was not quite sure of himself when it came to say goodbye. Baba shook hands and said 'The handshake is the memorial of catching the vibrations of God'.
So I guess the original hug is melting into Gods heart.
Hugs all round