Post-BK Spiritual Growth

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Post-BK Spiritual Growth

Post02 Jun 2008

Post-BK Spiritual Growth - posted by: Atma on April 17, 2004

Isabel and Gyaniwasi,

Thanks for sharing some of your Abu experiences. Perhaps, I can share some of mine.

To condense things, let me say that I came into Gyan a long time ago. After the initial intoxication and involvement in service etc, things gradually petered out and that “high” feeling became flat. certain cynicism crept in, which was caused partly by observations of hypocrisy, double talk, double think and double standards. So, after a little over three years as a committed BK, I drifted off from the path. I had “mentally detached” from it for some time before I outwardly left.

I visited Abu twice. The first time was during my initial period of involvement. It was not a pleasant experience. The train trip was very long, and second class seats are hell. Added to that, my stomach reacted badly to the food and water. Those were the days of the “footprint” style toilets.

After many years of being out of the path, I started to feel a need to go back and complete some unfinished business with the BKs. I therefore got involved again - this time in a more detached way and with eyes WIDE open - no illusions.

After the required period of “purification” and preparation, I returned to Abu. I understood that I had taken all from the path that I could, and also given all that I had to give. So, even though I told no one, I KNEW that this second and final trip was going to be my last….a sort of farewell and wrapping up of things. I am glad I made the trip. It went very well and, ironically, the experience was much better than my first visit

When the time came to listen to Baba in the massive Diamond Hall, I was mentally and spiritually prepared. The system has changed a lot from the old days. Because of the crowds, there are very few personal and group meetings. Nowadays, people file past and take a second’s drishti, in an assembly line manner.

Anyway, when it came to my turn, this is what I was repeating in my mind : “I make my peace with you. I take my leave from you. I make my peace with you. I take my leave from you.”

Baba was smiling and holding his right arm up, bent at the elbow, open palm forward ... slowly rocking in back and forth, in the “blessing hand” gesture. So that was my last memory of him. Not a bad last memory, eh?

Just thought that I would share this with you all ... in the spirit of the discussion.

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