Forgiveness

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sparkal

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Forgiveness

Post20 Feb 2007

FORGIVENESS-

This is a real virtue, not that the others are meaningless, but with this one we really can make changes. Ever sat for a moment and forgiven everyone who as ever supposedly wronged you? I won't fill in all the blanks and leave some for others.
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Mr Green

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Post20 Feb 2007

:idea:
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mitra

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Post21 Feb 2007

The quality of forgiveness will enable us not to remember the bad past experiences again and again. It will save a lot of TIME! :idea:

IBHS
MITRA 8)
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yudhishtira

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Post21 Feb 2007

Good point sparkal. Actually, I find the number 1 tough person to forgive often is myself!!! I often find that judgement/criticism that I have of myself is mirrored then in how I treat others.

Last year in Madhuban, I spent a lot of time focussing on forgiving souls I had issues with; but I didnt find that I had really let go. I think the reason for that was that I hadn't let go of the judgement and criticism I hold towards myself. I have high standards of behaviour and so when I behave in a way I know is not good, I am very aware of that. My lesson to learn is not to focus on changing that behaviour or feel bad about it, but to love and understand myself unconditionally and express and experience my innate positive qualities. However the Bhakti sanskars of blame do run deep!!
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Mr Green

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Post21 Feb 2007

Forgiveness is not powerful enough to heal deep subconsciuos wounds, you can say I forgive as much as you like but it can just be an intellectual excercise to those in real pain.

Feel free to post smart ass comments like you have to really forgive from the heart, but sometimes it's not as easy as that.

In fact, this is a good example of the daft simplistic approach some take whilst pretending they have changed.
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yudhishtira

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Post22 Feb 2007

Mr Green wrote:Forgiveness is not powerful enough to heal deep subconsciuos wounds, you can say I forgive as much as you like but it can just be an intellectual excercise to those in real pain. Feel free to post smart ass comments like you have to really forgive from the heart, but sometimes it's not as easy as that. In fact, this is a good example of the daft simplistic approach some take whilst pretending they have changed.

I appreciate what you are saying here. Very often, the BK approach seems superficial "fake it until you make it". A lot of the virtues listed like "forgiveness", "mercy" can seem tough when you are really hurting inside. They also, to my mind, have connotatations of blame and guilt. Which is why in my experience the only thing that works is love. Unconditional love with no strings attached; and I find I cant accept love or give love out unless I first love myself.

I suppose the other thing is understanding. I mean real understanding in a spiritual sense. Not just saying "its drama", which frankly never worked for me, but understanding why people behave the way they do, and understanding and accepting that I am going to feel cr*p about some things and that that is OK.

I wonder what the Hindi interpretation of their word for forgiveness is? There is a lot of heavy feelings attached to that word ...
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arjun

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Post22 Feb 2007

Yudhishtira wrote: wonder what the Hindi interpretation of their word for forgiveness is? theres a lot of heavy feelings attached to that word ...

In Hindi it is called 'kshama'.

If I am correct, there is a saying in Hindi - kshama dharma ka mool hai - forgiveness is the core of religion.

Regards,
OGS,
Arjun
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yudhishtira

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Post22 Feb 2007

arjun wrote:In Hindi it is called 'kshama'. If I am correct, there is a saying in Hindi - kshama dharma ka mool hai - forgiveness is the core of religion.

Thanks for that Arjun; I guess what I was asking for was, what is the sense or feeling connected with "kshama"? Tough question in a way but I was trying to see if it felt like it was a burdensome or heavy thing or whether its interpreted as being spiritual and loving (at the risk of asking a leading question! :roll: ).
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arjun

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Post22 Feb 2007

OMshanti. Another virtue closely related to forgiveness is mercy/compassion. And this is what Avyakt BapDada has said about the virtue of mercy/compassion:

“All the Brahmin souls consider yourselves to be the great souls or religious (i.e.pious) souls of Aadi Sanaatan ancient religion. So, O religious souls! The first religion, i.e. inculcation of all of you is to have a feeling of compassion and a merciful vision towards yourself, towards the Brahmin family and towards all the souls of the world.... Whatever resolve anyone may possess, this feeling or vision of compassion and mercy can transform even a stone into water. Those who are in your opposition can also remain in their position (i.e. in a soul conscious stage). Those, whose resolves clash, can also become Thakur (Master). The fire of anger will get transformed into a flame of Yoga. The difficult karmic accounts of many births will end in a second and a new relationship will be born. However opposite one may be – with this method he will embrace you. But the basis of all this is – ‘a feeling of compassion’. ... The one, who possesses the feeling of mercy, will always be incorporeal (niraakaari), viceless (nirvikaari) and egoless (nir-ahankaari). Mind will be incorporeal, words would be viceless and actions would be egoless. Such a soul is called compassionate or merciful soul.” (Avyakt Vani dated 12.10.81, pg.63-64)
Yudhishtira wrote:what is the sense or feeling connected with "kshama"? tough question in a way, but I was trying to see if it felt like it was a burdensome or heavy thing or whether its interpreted as being spiritual and loving

Forgiveness can be burdensome if it is not done from the heart, but on being asked by someone to forgive someone or due to the pressure of circumstances to forgive someone although you feel inside that the person you are forgiving is not worthy of it.

Forgiveness can be non-burdensome if you are forgiving anyone who is your friend or relative whom you love or when you are forgiving someone for having committed a mistake/harm unknowingly.

Forgiveness can be selfish/conditional if you are forgiving anyone who can cause benefit to you at a later point of time.

But forgiveness can be truly spiritual only if you are forgiving any person who has caused harm to you wilfully. Forgiveness can be truly spiritual only if you are forgiving any person without expecting any favour in return for the act of forgiving. The soul consciousness or soul conscious vision that ShivBaba is teaching helps us in imbibing forgiveness.

Regards,
OGS,
Arjun

bansy

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Post22 Feb 2007

Anyone, what's the direct opposite of forgiveness in one word ?
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yudhishtira

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Post22 Feb 2007

bansy wrote:Anyone, what's the direct opposite of forgiveness in one word ?

Blame when in relation to others and guilt when in relation to myself - thats my take anyway ...
and arjun, thanks for your response. I get that. I was just trying to see if, like with so many things, there is a difference through translation of the feeling of the word itself in Hindi than there is in English. Thanks for trying though. :D
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ex-l

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Post22 Feb 2007

bansy wrote:Anyone, what's the direct opposite of forgiveness in one word ?

May be resentment ... or accusation?
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abrahma kumar

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Post22 Feb 2007

ex-l wrote:May be resentment ... or accusation?

To which we can also add Condemnation according to http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/forgiveness
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driedexbk

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Post22 Feb 2007

bansy wrote:Anyone, what's the direct opposite of forgiveness in one word ?

Mercilessness and/or punishment?

bansy

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Post23 Feb 2007

Thanks for the replies. Interesting that one word can conjure up many opposites. A Zenny friend remarked that what is forgiveness when there is no such forgiveness, it's all just a state of the mind.
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