Hello from a new ex

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omns

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Hello from a new ex

Post14 Jan 2010

Hello,

I write this post a little heavy hearted this morning. Today I have decided never to have anything to do with my local BK centre again. This has been a decision a long time coming and one that unsettles me on one hand but feels right on the other.

I have been attending my local centre for about the last 5 years. In that time, my attendance has been sporadic as I struggled to come to terms with what I was being taught there. My questions began during the initial course surrounding The Cycle and this became something that lead me to constantly question what I was learning.

Despite this, I always felt an incredible connection to the divine at the centre and have always been driven by the experiences I obtained during drishti. If I am honest with myself this is what kept me going and, of course, the friendship and camaraderie I felt with my Brothers and Sisters. These aspects I will miss greatly. I have no doubt that the people at my centre are very sincere honest people who truly believe in the path they are following and, try as I may, I have not been able to follow in the same direction.

In recent times, I had been talking to several BKs about my struggles and received various levels of advice. Some advised me to ignore the finer details regarding The Cycle, time, dates and to focus in on the central 'vibe' of what was being taught. Others recommended focusing on the tremendous energy that is generated at the centres. These were comforting words, as this is essentially what kept me attending over years, but in the end it hasn't been enough to justify continuing my association with the BKs

Over the years, I have had periods where I attended morning class regularly and this would be fine until I would hit one of those curly Murlis that really challenged me on so many levels. This usually centred around the constant denigrating of other spiritual paths and how eagerly these views were accepted by the Brothers and Sisters in attendance. They seemed to have no trouble at all denigrating other sincere seekers and their chosen paths. I guess the Murli I attended this week was the last straw, with this same message being taught and repeated. There are many other issues that have challenged me on many levels and I guess the above is just an example of one of them.

I feel comfortable that my spiritual journey now lies in another direction. During the last 6 weeks or so I have dedicated myself to finally making a decision one way or the other about life as a BK. I have attended class regularly and been earnest in endeavours to resolve this one way or the other. I felt disturbed and unsettled as the truth began to emerge but I pushed forward to achieve an end result. The end result of this process is a resolve that this cannot continue any longer. I feel a bit sad today but know that I have done the right thing :).

bkti-pit

Independent, free thinking BK

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post15 Jan 2010

Welcome omns and congratulations for your courage in following your conscience and common sense.
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rayoflight

beyond BK

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post15 Jan 2010

Welcome oms. Your common sense is admirable and so is your courage.
In recent times I had been talking to several BK's about my struggles and received various levels of advice. Some advised me to ignore the finer details regarding The Cycle, time, dates and to focus in on the central 'vibe' of what was being taught.

And congratulations on finding your way out of the ignorance that is taught. It is this very advice that keeps people going around in circles with the BKs even though they know that something is not quite right. I wish you a happy new life and new spiritual path.
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ex-l

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post15 Jan 2010

rayoflight wrote:It is this very advice that keeps people going around in circles with the BKs even though they know that something is not quite right.

Me too ... welcome back to the real world. Yes, the patter is all very well tried out and polished by now ... it is treadmill trod by many before you.

What disappoints me the most about the BKWSU is, when it all comes down to the bottomline, it is "all Bhakti". That is all they have got. And you know what they mean from a BK point of view ... it is the opposite of what they say it is, or should be.

Bhakti ... and raking the cash in by being "the sugar in the milk", to quote an old Sind saying. 90% of the practise is about keeping up appearances so as to not rock the boat (and stop the cash flow). If they told the truth, it would probably kill them (I am speaking of the leaders here not the earnest followers).
omns wrote:... this would be fine until I would hit one of those curly Murlis that really challenged me on so many levels. This usually centred around the constant denigrating of other spiritual paths and how eagerly these views were accepted by the Brothers and Sisters in attendance. They seemed to have no trouble at all denigrating other sincere seekers and their chosen paths.

Welcome ... that is a good sign. Basically, you are too spiritual for the BKWSU. Don't worry about it. Just don't doubt it.

An old non-BK friend of mine has a rap that goes something like "life is a classroom where the tests are given first and the lessons afterwards".

OK ... now you will read why those intuitions which you had were well founded and you will be left wondering why you did not leave earlier!

The lesson ...

    Well, now you know all about how cults work and can in time become cultures ... how we become owned and possessed by them ... and being able to step back from it all, you will be able to see and understand far much more about humanity than whilst you were stuck in playing your part as an ill fitting cog in their machine.

bkti-pit

Independent, free thinking BK

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post17 Jan 2010

Hi omns!

To a large extent I got hooked onto the BK world because I had an "experience". But having powerful experiences of peace, love, bliss, etc, is not unique to the BKs. Actually, many BKs say that they do not have such experiences.

I know BKs who had their best experiences before Gyan. Among those I remember one who had his best experiences when he was a devotee of Satya Sai Baba. Another one had better experiences when he was hugged by Mata Amritanandamayi (the hugging saint) than he ever had in his BK life. Another one got his best experiences when he visited the PBKs in India and met with Baba Veerendra Dev Dixit.

In the first part of this video http://xenutv.wordpress.com/2008/04/21/jason-beghe-interview/ an ex member of the Church of Scientology describes the experience that pulled him into it. It is similar to someone having an experience of the soul when taking drishti from the Sister in a BK Center.

Having experiences is not a proof of truth or holiness.
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Mr Green

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post17 Jan 2010

Hi, and welcome back from the true kumbakarna.
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swordofjustice

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post17 Jan 2010

Hi Omns,

So, aspects of the teachings never sat well with you, huh? Well, that's OK.

It's very healthy for you to exercise your intellect and also your decision making capability as an adult. If the path is not working for you, then it's time to review what you're doing with your life.

I am glad to read your post mentioning that the people at your centre are honest and sincere. You also mention some very positive experiences. Your post is very decent and mature.

I suspect it's the lesson on The Cycle that doesn't sit well with you. That life is ultimately destined. The teaching is that we are immortal spirits passing from one life to another, but this cycle of consciousness repeats exactly. Pretty "left field" stuff, really.

For me, it just sits well. At times in my life, I have such strong deja vu. Also, at times, those people with some intuition and/or pyschic talent can accurately predict the future. I have some personal experiences in this area with people reading tarot cards and much more. How on earth could any soul predict what will come unless in some deep, deep way, life is "written"?

The beauty of this world though is that we actually have free choice, each moment is its own unique wonder where we spring left or right as we choose. We are not generally aware of this deep level of the world play where we are going to choose one way over the other. It's good to not be aware of the future so that we can enjoy our lives.

I have some books I could recommend where subjects under hypnosis regress to past lives. Some of these stories have been verified down to small details. I, personally, know one university academic here in Australia who has been studying psychology and trance states for 30 years. His name is Peter Ramster. He has conducted field research on such cases and I have seen the documented evidence confirming some of his patients stories of other lives.

But some souls under trance also tell of future events. This precognition really does imply that somehow we were always going to make the choices we make while being free to choose in each moment.

Anyway, that's enough on all of that. I want to finish by saying that denigrating anyone is not Raj Yoga. Raj Yoga does have a lot of support for following it's own particular systems and viewpoints. It can even be at a level where it's like hype. However, how many Murlis are there on respect, love and good wishes? So many ... So one must never allow such negative feelings where others are put down. No, everyone is good. If a soul is sincerely seeking the truth and goes to a different spiritual path, they are noble for doing that and also beloved of God. Every BK must understand Baba's teachings on good wishes.

Peace,
Peter
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omns

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post20 Jan 2010

Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement :D. Separation from the BKs has been surprisingly easy now that a final decision has been made.
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ex-l

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post20 Jan 2010

You might get a few phone calls and well meaning visits ... just tell them you have found this website and find it very interesting and you will probably get rid of them double quick!!!
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swordofjustice

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post22 Jan 2010

And those visits are good, Ex-I. They're usually sincere and nice. We want BKs to be connected in the heart space, yeah? It's a wonderful space, that one.

Cheers,
Sword
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ex-l

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post23 Jan 2010

Not always. They can also be artificial or manipulative. The BKWSU is a cult. Who really wants to be hounded by cult members wanting you to come back to them?

    Manipulative: in the first place because they are just trying to get you back into the cult and the degree of the manipulation depends on the skill of the individual BK, e.g. guilt and shame versus mother love type of approaches.
    Painfully artificial: when the BK realises that you are perfectly happy, you are getting on well and have no intention of coming back.
A bit like a visit from the Jehovah Witnesses, you know why they are there and what they are selling. What prompts them. You are not interested in buying but they think they can save you. At some point they might try and get a bit of holy toli in you to pull you back.

I suppose what undercuts this is that even friendships within the BKWSU are discouraged and not really "allowed", e.g. attachment is Maya and all that. So even if you have someone you "like", you are not supposed to "like them" and create bonds. Bonds are what the rest of the real world depend on. A best, those bonds might just be used to try and pull you back in.

The most responsible thing to do is to explain to them how the BKWSU leadership has falsified their history, re-write Gyan and is manipulating them. All of the stuff you can learn from this website (lock the door before your start though). If that does not work (because they are all tooled up to avoid such discussion), probably the best thing to do is to introduce them to your half-dressed lover, offer them some food to eat or pour them a beer ... and then watch them run!!!

because.parmeshwar

exiting BK

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post23 Jan 2010

If that does not work (because they are all tooled up to avoid such discussion), probably the best thing to do is to introduce them to your half-dressed lover, offer them some food to eat or pour them a beer ... and then watch them run!!!

Deeeeeep research ... :D :D :D.
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lokila

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post29 Jan 2010

swordofjustice wrote:And those visits are good, Ex-I. They're usually sincere and nice.

I never told this story to anyone because still. After so many years, I feel a little ashamed. It was back in the nineties when a pukka BK who lived in the center suddenly left, rented a place for herself and started redecorating her new home. A Sister and me were given the assignment to go and visit her. We told her we would come and help her, so she was looking forward to our visit, thinking we would give her a hand. But in fact, the only thing we were focusing on was to get her back into the BK by giving her dhristi, spreading 'good' vibrations and ... feeding her lots of toli.

We carried the box of holy toli from the center as if it was something magic which could bring her back to God. However, it did not take long before she understood we were not helping her at all. Instead, we were on a mission. She got furious and threw us out. (Well, she used to be our best cook and finest toli maker so, of course, she knew what we were trying to do).

Now I can understand her reaction fully. But at the time I was convinced of my divine mission. She was just disturbed by Maya and needed to be 'saved'. I had all good intentions but was so blinded and convinced by the idea I knew what was good for her because I had a relationship with God (the arrogance!). She was tricked by demons; so whatever her wish was, it was false.

You see, there cannot be any communication or mutual understanding when people are on such different levels. BKs are convinced they are the only ones who know what is right and wrong. They are on a secret mission and know exactly what is right for you. This is one-way communication. Heart-to-heart contact is impossible this way.
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rayoflight

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post30 Jan 2010

lokila,

Your sincerity is so honest and so ... un-BK. Thank you for your courage.

A big hug,
rayoflight

because.parmeshwar: your deep research is excellent ;).
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Mr Green

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Re: Hello from a new ex

Post01 Feb 2010

Lokila

your story reminds me of when I was leaving and in negotiations for compensation. I'd just spent a grueling hour with Dadi Janki telling me how fantastic I am and how Shanti Bhavan was always open to me, when all I wanted was some financial stability.

Anyway, a Brother who I'd been close to, stopped me in the reception of GCH. After exchanging pleasantries he leaned down and whispered in my ear ... "We all know you are just 'on holiday'!" ... What an ugly feeling I was left with, such complete lack of caring for what I might be experiencing.

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