Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

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zaphate

friends or family of a BK

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  • Joined: 02 May 2010

Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post03 May 2010

First, I would like to thank everyone involved with creating, maintaining, and contributing to this website. It has been a lifeline for me to know that I am not alone.

My wife has been involved with the BK thing, off and on for about 20 years, in four different countries. When I met her, she was recovering from a major breakdown. She had been in an Asian country, working and going to "the center" every morning, meditating and providing free labor. When she started to go psychotic and went to the center for help, they literally physically tossed her out in the street! No help offered! Thanks to a kind friend who took her back to Canada, she managed to get some treatment and was getting better slowly when I met her. I took her in, fell in love, and married.

She talked about the BK thing, I told her that if she wanted to follow BK teachings, then I wasn't the man for her. She made the choice to be with me, and I thought that everything was fine. About a year later, she went on a camping trip, and when she came back, she started to act strangely ... turns out she had spent almost the whole time in her tent, reading BK stuff (Murlis), and getting more and more messed up.

To make a very long story shorter, she got pregnant and started breaking down again ... ended up in another psyche ward and it took me a few months of constant visits and harassing the authorities to get her out. Had a daughter (healthy) who is now 17. My wife seemed to drop the whole BK thing, but a few years later, started in again ... started acting strange ... I gave her an ultimatum: BK or me. After about a month, she told me she had decided that she wanted to be with me and our daughter. Great!

No more mention of BKs for a few years, until pregnancy happened again. Well, when our son was three months old, wife forced me to leave house. Son is now nine. Daughter doesn't buy any of the BK bs. Wife has been filling my sons head with confusing BK bs.

There is so much more to tell, thanks for giving me an opportunity to vent. I sure would like to make contact with any ex-bks in the Vancouver area.

BTW ... All of you deceitful, manipulating, family destroying people WILL HAVE TO ANSWER FOR YOUR CRIMES!

A
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ex-l

ex-BK

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to

Post04 May 2010

Thank you for your comments. We are indebted to you too.

It is incredible. Every time I think we must have hit the bottom of the barrel, and stopped documenting BKWSU roadkill, another ... worse ... case comes along.

I have to say that, excluding the suicides and other borderline psychiatric problems, yours is one of the worst cases that I have heard off.

Describing the Brahma Kumari leadership as "deceitful, manipulating, family destroying people" is a fairly accurate assessment. Seven decades of breaking up families with 'End of the World' nonsense to mask a simple transaction, the extract of time, money and energy from society and other families into their society and 'business religion'.

Are you able to communicate to your ex-partner at all .. do you think you could de-construct her beliefs by showing her what you have learned here about their historical revision and false predictions and so on? Individuals within their influence are deeply deceived.

An ex-member of this forum, who was married to a half-and-half or in-and-out BK woman, pointed out a simple truth, that where there were often other problems, perhaps a history of abuse or lack of personal development, for which Brahma Kumarism becomes a crutch or lifeboat for the individual. It is very difficult to remove because of its deep programming.

I wonder if it would be possible to take legal action to stop your son being enculted?

Please do vent ... and document ... it will help the many others like yourself worldwide.

From a BKWSU point of view, strictly speaking from the organization's own rules, they do not accept individuals with mental problems.

It might be worth having your lawyer draft a letter to the BKWSO's regional coordinator to draw this to their attention and remind them of their Duty of Care in such incidents citing the history and the deleterious effect of their involvement on your family.


Of course, the BKWSO regularly ignore this in practise because they need adherents and you would have to be nuts to believe in what they do. You should be aware that a lot of enculting goes on unofficially by adherents encourage themselves into increasing madness without the leaderships' direct involvement or even awareness, busy as they are chasing VIPs and big money. Likewise, a lot of "sneaky advising" goes on between cult members that is not "official" and is never recorded, so the leaders wash their hands of all responsibility. They claim to legally have "no members". No members equals no responsibilities. They turn a blind eye to anything, even if it is unethical, that keeps adherents addicted and inline.

Unless your partner has money, her only value to them is as a free laborer and so her status will be low. Frankly, she will be considered as dispensable by them ... especially if she is "trouble", i.e. mentally unstable. Writing such a letter might have the effect of having her "banned" from the center although they will probably still encourage her to public events. Normally, they will keep sending invitations and press releases to keep her on. The leaders specifically encourage the targeting of ex-members to swell the ranks and provide support at public events.

Seriously consider protecting the family home if you can because one common deal they do is to accept individuals surrender to the organization in exchange for property, i.e. they get looked after for life ... having to work for free ... and the BKWSO get the property as an evangelist center.

Put it into a trust for your children or something. Keep any money you can out of her hands if it is likely to go into their sticky mitts. I do not know the law in this area, but if you have to support her, try and keep the support in practical forms rather then monetary forms, e.g. paying bills rather than handing over cash.

The problem being is they encourage their adherents to believe they can improve their karma, "purify themselves" or earn a high status in heaven by giving money to the leaders. The other problem you might have is that official and legal bodies, e.g. courts etc, hardly appreciate what a hold and influences cults like these have over individuals and tend to see them ... as the BKWSU aggressively promote itself ... as established religions.

Lastly, start to view the Brahma Kumaris as they are, a 'spiritualist' religion not a Yoga or Hindu group, which they are not. They are "dabbling with spirits" as the Christians call it. It does not matter if you believe in spirits or even if spirits exist - that is another matter - but the effects, activities and beliefs are all much more along the lines of a psychic occultist group rather than an intellectual or even faith based group.

This might help in understanding her reactions. We can probably decipher the rest.

zaphate

friends or family of a BK

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post04 May 2010

Thank you. Need time to digest.
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ex-l

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post04 May 2010

Sadly, the one last thing I would say from experience is that in such a situation, I would not expect the BKWSO to act ethically. For example, if you did write a letter of concern to the leadership, about the encultation of your son or wife's mental condition, there is a risk they would forward it to her, worsen your relationship. We have experienced them being pretty underhanded when push comes to shove.

Having said that, they do now claim to be putting into place safeguards to stop such conflicts and so you could write to the leadership asking about who their "global functioning" representative is and how they go about assisting in reconciliation. I do not know of anyone who has tried this or how developed it is.

In your area, do you still have Nikki de Carteret acting for the Brahma Kumaris?

She was a rising star in the BKWSU's Western mechanism who, word had it, move out of London town because it was not big enough for the two of her and the current leader and relative of the founder Jayanti Kripalani. She is involved in the Centre for Conflict Resolution Instructors in B.C. and has fallen foul of our critique of leading Western BKs to re-market themselves commercially as corporate and personal consultant trainers. I understand she was center director out there.

I do not mention this to suggest it would me of assistance to you necessarily. Quite the opposite, I don't trust any of them. But it could be a useful leverage point.

bkti-pit

Independent, free thinking BK

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post05 May 2010

I have heard from two different sources that Nikki had left the BKs. Not sure how true it is.

In terms of someone from the Global Functionning reform team to help with reconciliation, I think you are dreaming my dear ex-l. Global Functionning was intended for foreigners but the Indian leadership never was very warm. Even though Westerners might be sincere when they talk about reconciliation, I doubt that we will see any significant change in the way the BKWSU operates. I have yet to see a genuine effort towards reconciliation from them. They are usually only interested in neutralizing opposition.

zaphate

friends or family of a BK

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post19 May 2010

Hello all .. The BKs were at the Health and Wellness show in Vancouver a few weeks ago. My wife was there to do free "readings" of some sort. A woman that called herself Klig seemed to be in charge. Old, dried up, prunish looking woman. I took her picture 3 times ... all three came out blank. Took the wife's pic sitting in the same chair 20 minutes later and pic turned out perfect ... weird. There was another woman there that was super friendly and laughed at all my jokes (I was trying not to freak out on them) and looked me right in the eyes ... very sexy like ... but totally obvious to me. Aarrgghh!!! My wife is a lost cause.

All you BK manipulators are gonna have to answer for your crimes!

A

BTW, I am open to calls 250 zap hate
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ex-l

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Re: Looking for someone to talk to (... wife in BKWSU)

Post20 May 2010

zaphate wrote:The BKs were at the Health and Wellness show in Vancouver a few weeks ago. My wife was there to do free "readings" of some sort. There was another woman there that was super friendly ... and looked me right in the eyes ... very sexy like ... but totally obvious to me.

That "look" was probably ... at least in theory ... "Dhristi", supposedly a sort of transmission of loveful spiritual vibrations from their god, through her soul, to you.

The "readings" a sort of thing they do as a way of drawing people in ... fake fortune telling based on an "angel cards" kind of New Age philosophy. It is not really a "reading", they do not do readings and are not trained in doing readings. It is really just a soft sell chit-chat.

Yes, it seems that you have lost her. Are you separating?

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