Should I be worried?

for ex-BKs, exiting BKs, Friends & Family of BKs and newcomers to the forum.
  • Message
  • Author

steveo

friends or family of a BK

  • Posts: 6
  • Joined: 20 Oct 2010

Should I be worried?

Post01 Nov 2010

My partner has just returned from a meditation retreat and says that is was peaceful and inspirational but will not become a member of BK. She says however, that she may return to do some courses such as Positive Thinking. During a conversation she says that she Loves me and we have a future together. Any thoughts, how should I play this?
User avatar

ex-l

ex-BK

  • Posts: 10661
  • Joined: 07 Apr 2006

Re: Should I be worried?

Post02 Nov 2010

The Brahma Kumaris "win" because they have a gorgeous (albeit cold) mansion house and gardens in the country and offer New Agey courses for free. If you can deal with ignoring the very minor guilt hints about making voluntary donations, you might even get away with a few free meals too. part of the appeal is that they can make you an instant guru in a kind of Forest Gump way.

The New Agey courses are not what the Brahma Kumaris are all about. The real teachings are here. This is allegedly how "God" - the one and only one - speaks to humanity ... and exclusively to the Brahma Kumaris.

The New Age courses are the warm bath to entice individuals in. The real meat starts to take place in the mediations at the end of all the waffle. During the waffle, the BKs will appear to be interested, enthusiastic and listening to your partners opinions etc. In truth, they are just sitting there meditating 'at' her ... zapping her with their psychic vibes ... doing what they call "dhristi", a kind of staring in which they imagine linking up to their god spirit and then hook up her, or they actually experience being used as a channel or medium for that/those spirits.

These are not all the words the BKs uses but I am trying best to explain it in terms you might understand. The meditation is a prelude to mediumship ... many people do not get beyond the simple sitting peacefully listen or meditating phase.

The real BK course used to be called "The 7 Days Course". They do not teach this straight off any more because it is too whacky. So they will entertain her, befriend her, "take her pulse" until she is "ready", i.e. gullible or defenses have dropped enough, in order to go to the next level or full indoctrination. The 7 Days Course is now also often split over 2 courses and so the initiation into a relationship with this spirit entity may take a period long time; weeks or months.

I think the best thing you can do is go straight to the teachings. Print off the posters, here or here, print off the teachings manuals or books, print off a few Murlis and leave them around so she can see them. Read them yourself. Ask her if she agrees with them. It is probably a better strategy than fighting it. Note though, the BKs are likely start to give her all sorts of "yuktis" to not answering straight or questions. They will likely not be not answering straight or her questions at this point. It will all be very vague and appealing.

Alternatively, do not make it obvious and just keep her otherwise entertained. Love her well and make sure the sex is good because is she gets sucked in, that will be all over.

If she asks what the BKWSU is all about, you need to make it clear that the BKWSU is not about waffly stuff like, "our original state of being" , "the light", "the one", "the innate goodness of all human beings" (that last one even goes against their own teachings). It is about hooking people up to a spook, a disincarnate spirit who claims it is the god of all religion ... called "BapDada" ... who possess an old lady in India and speaks through her.Of course, perhaps she might find that interesting/appealing/intriguing at which point you might have a problem ...

Therefore, in essence, if she is serious about them, educate yourself a little bit about them. Buy the Dr John Walliss book and read it. Read what is here.

Is she the sort that if you push too hard she might react and go in the other direction to them?

steveo

friends or family of a BK

  • Posts: 6
  • Joined: 20 Oct 2010

Re: Should I be worried?

Post02 Nov 2010

Yes, she is independent, strong, intelligent and knows her own mind but any pressure may get a stubborn reaction. Sometimes, she is very loving and caring but other times more quiet or withdrawn. She was withdrawn last night and this worries me after recent events. I am afraid to discuss BKs in case I say the wrong thing.
User avatar

annamaria

exiting BK

  • Posts: 14
  • Joined: 24 Jul 2010

Re: Should I be worried?

Post03 Nov 2010

Dear Steveo,

thank you for your sharings - you have already ben given lots of key information. Let me add from my experience of being a BK member for 10 years and my way out.

It seems you are very worried and afraid which is absolutly understandable as you fear to lose your loved one. The bond of love you have will be the way - if that does work it will be alright. So what is love? Love emerges and grows onces we feel felt - two brains and nerous systems attuned to one another (or souls for thos who like that kind of images) - that's what underlies the feeling of love in all its colors. That's why I feel it is even more crucial to support that kind of resonance as much as possible. To be able to tune into your partners feelings, experiences, words and really share her world, so that she can feel felt you need to be in rather calm and attentive space inside. Also it will help you - besides those shared moments being THE most beautiful experience there is in life anyway (at least in my experience).

Those moments of resonance were what brought me alive and enabled me to live without the scaffolding of a cult that gives you orientation and easy answers for everything. Fact is that life is a complicated multilayered experience demanding a lot abilites and resiliance on the emotional level and many of us where not in the position to learn that from childhood. Recently I came across the writings by Daniel Siegel, an American psychologist who discribes that resonant feeling of love or "feeling felt" very well. It was so beautifull and helpfull indeed to be given words for what I had experienced and "reserched" for myself. As I am not English speaking I do not know the original title. But I am sure your will find it by looking for the name and/or "mind-sight", that's how he calls our ability to tune into our own and someone else's mind.

Lastly, one thought about relationships. Having someone we love in our live is a great gift but never guaranteed. Of course the possibility to lose your loved one to a cult seems worse but the way to your love may be the same to ohter challenges towards a relationship.

I realy feel that if you keep your own love alive, trust in the strength of it and resonate with her this might well be a renewal of your realtionship. Don't think she will fall in love with "Baba" whilst there is you alive, loving and much more real that a dot you talk to in your head. So, yes, it is good to be informed but also trust her, please - both head and heart. And if I feel afraid to talk about something cause I might say the wrong things I try to postpone that till I feel more comfortable which interestingly always happens at some point.

All the best! Annamaria.

Return to Newcomers