I am in a relationship with a BK

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viveksingh570

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I am in a relationship with a BK

Post07 Jun 2012

Jedi wrote:I am really confused by what they teach at the BK org. I have a girlfriend for the past 6 years. I love her more than anything, never been unfaithful, always worried for her. I have sacrificed a lot for her and have no regrets.

Now for the past year she has said everything related to love is a sin. So she has distanced herself from me. She hardly meets me and spends more time at the BK org. She says making love is a sin and that I need to find someone else because I am impure for wanting a physical relationship ...

How is it that the BKs condemn any physical relationship between the husband and wife or between loved ones and their founder Dada Lekhraj had kids of his own? So their leader wasn't celibate but he wants everyone else to be?

Hi there, me too. I have same problem. I don't know what to do know.

I am in a relationship for 2 years, now she is saying that she doesn't want to live in a relationship ... the love, relationship and etc is nothing, only god is there in end ... what should I do ???

I really love her but now it look like I am losing her.
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Koolbloke

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

Hi. I've copied-and-pasted below my reply to Jedi from another topic. Hope it helps.

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Hi, Jedi.

Here's my own experience with them. My wife and I attended their learning sessions and continued on to watch their Murli sessions, mainly because it felt so peaceful. Learning to meditate with open eyes and anywhere, anytime was really cool. But here is the deal: in order to go deep into their philosophy and achieve what they call "a pure state" we would have to opt for abstinence. That did not go well with our plans of starting our family. We approached the leader of the centre with our concern and were told to simply come visit whenever we needed. But that was our choice.

It is clear that your girlfriend has decided to go a different direction. Many took this path as a conscious decision, others just took the jump without weighing the pros and cons and realised their hasty decison later. You know your girlfriend better than anyone so if you think she is a sort of "trance" and will eventually snap out of it, be patient and keep helping her.

Good luck, man !
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alanna

friends or family of a BK

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

Hi vivek,

Sorry to hear the BKs have got to your girlfriend. I really recommend Steve Hassan's books for advice on how to communicate with and support a loved one who is in a cult (and hopefully get them out!): http://freedomofmind.com/Media/books.php

One of the most important things to remember is that the BK belief system is portraying you as a negative influence on her that will affect her ability to be close to God, become "pure" and be born again into the Golden Age (the BK version of heaven) when the world ends (which is supposedly going to be very soon). You and all other non-BKs are impure and "full of vices". So when you talk to her about the BKs and her involvement, try not to get angry or overly negative as this will reinforce the belief system and so entrench her commitment to the group (i.e. it will "prove" that the BK view of you is correct). It will make it harder for her to listen to you and trust you. Show and tell her that you care about her, and that your concern about her involvement comes from place of love - it's not to do with any selfish reasons on your part.

Read as much as you can about the BKWSU on this site, particularly the negative impact it has had on other people and the historical revisionism. Don't then bombard her with the information and make accusations or angry statements, but ask her whether she was aware of some of these things and what she thinks about them. Try and encourage her to think for herself and to think critically. Mind control is based around preventing people from doing this (meditating for hours a day, focused on a spot of light, and not getting enough sleep are some of the ways this happens in the BKWSU). If she decides to stop or reduce her involvement, she needs to come to the decision herself, not because she has felt bullied or coerced into doing so.

I am not saying this will definitely work, but hopefully that gives you a better idea of how you might be able to approach the issue with her.

All the very best.
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alanna

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

Koolbloke - I am glad you were able to resist the call for abstinence so you could start a family! I found out a few years ago that my mum always wanted to have lots of children, but was never able to have more after my younger Sister because of their involvement with the BKs - so sad.
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Koolbloke

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

I guess that was your mum's own choice at the time to give up on her wish of having more children, Alanna. If she thinks it was a mistake, she needs to come to terms with it and move on. Everyone makes choices they may regret later.
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alanna

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

It wasn't her choice. She did not really want to be a BK, but it was the only way to be with my dad and keep the family together, plus she felt guilt-tripped into trying to believe and follow the BK lifestyle. Having the promise of God's eternal love and thousands of years of bliss, peace and wealth ripped away from you and replaced with being forever reborn into a world of suffering and alienated from your true home, Father and family if you don't "follow the path" is a powerful motivator for doing as you're told.

Please see my post I just left on the misguided altruism thread - I don't think you really understand how controlling the BKWSU can be.
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ex-l

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Jun 2012

alanna wrote:I found out a few years ago that my mum always wanted to have lots of children, but was never able to have more after my younger Sister because of their involvement with the BKs - so sad.

Sad enough in the West ... a personal tragedy ... an early death sentence in developing nations like the rural India which the Brahma Kumaris prey on, and where children are your future wealthy and "pension".

How many individuals gave up having children under the influence of false or re-written predictions of the End of the World which never came true?

(I remind the form of at least one young women in the early 1980s being encouraged to have an abortion by the Kripalani Klan so that she could follow the god of the Brahma Kumaris and adhere to the cult ... because Destruction was so close and children were such a distraction.

That child will now be 30 ... but, according to Jayanti, Destruction is still two to three years away so don't think of having nay more!

The Brahma Kumaris are not just anti-sex, anti-affection but anti-children, anti-family in my opinion.
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Suganthi

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post08 Nov 2012

I am facing the same problem too. We were in love for the past 3 years. He was the most perfect guy I have ever seen. He was so loving and he loves kids so much. He was in BK since he was 10. His Father is very active in it and he has been to Madhuban too. He was perfectly normal until early of 2012. He went for a 4 days camp organised by BK and he came back just to say that he thinks I am Sister to him! I called and inform his mum but she never believe me and she was so confident that her son would not choose that path in life.

We stayed together with lots of misunderstandings and arguments almost every day. One day, I just gave up and went away with my family to overseas for a week holiday without informing him. When I came back he called me and explained that he is not doing it on purpose. He wants to change but he cannot just stop believing in what he has been believing for the past 10 years. He ask to give him some time so he could ask around about what is the real truth. But I don't trust that he will go around and ask other than BK on this matter.

I don't know how to prove to him that BK is indeed a cult organization. I don't know how to prove that BK are not teaching according to Hinduism. He wants to see the proof in terms of books and also by meeting someone who has the real knowledge behind Hinduism and BK. Please give me some ideas. I really want to help him but sometimes I feel all my efforts are just useless.

I am in Malaysia and I really want to know if by any chance anyone of you knows or are in the position to explain to him. Please help me out. I don't know how long my life will be miserable like this. I don't want to prolong this as time passes I am scared he will become fully into it. At least he can understand things as he is confused now. Please help me out. Really appreciate any of your comments. Thank you.
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ex-l

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post09 Nov 2012

Unfortunately, I don't know anyone in Malaysia, or even near there. What else can we do to help?

How long has he been under the influence of the BKs? It helps to know when because newcomers are unaware of much of the history of the earlier period, all the failed predictions, historical re-writes and so on. How old is he? It sounds ike he is still quite young, idealistic and inexperienced in the world.

If he has been fully conditioned by the BKs, he will accept the most unreasonable things. He will accept that so called "God" can make errors and false predictions of the End of the World. He won't question that the leadership re-writes the Murlis to suit their own agenda. He may not even be concerned that they have falsified their history so as to give an entirely false impression. We can prove all of those, will they help?

He will just come out with things like, "Oh, Baba was testing us ... Oh, that was the Anti-Party". They BK leaders are so used to challenges that they have become very mentally defended, and followers are conditioned not to think and not to question.

5,000 Year Cycle, dinosaurs 2,500 years ago ... how could anyone believe that? There are numerous scientific questions to ask they immediately defeat BK theory, e.g. how does light from stars travel more than 5,000 years or reverse in time and space for the next Kalpa etc. BKs have no real answers for them ... but their minds are made soft and they don't think rationally so much ... the hooks are psychic and emotional.

I guess for most of us here we ask, "why any religion?" Life goes on without it, often much better. For me, it is about ethics ... by deceiving people over decades, and taking money and property from them, the BKWSU has proven themselves to be unethical and continue to be so.

Can "God" be unethical? Can those of "God" be unethical? Can an Age of Truth be built on lies?

One thing I will say is that if there is to be any hope in your relationship, you must make it clear that he stops all contact with the BKs, attending BK events and tells them to stop contacting him ... otherwise they will keep pulling on him and manipulating time and time again.

Let's start by focusing on the failed predictions. Does he know that their god has made numerous failed predictions of Destruction in WWII, 1950, 1976, mid-1980s, mid-1980s-1990s, and the leadership was making a false predictions, and encouraging people to empty bank accounts, in Year 2000?

No, it was *not* the mistake of followers, it came direct from the Murlis.

Likewise, does he know that there was no mention of Shiva in the religion until at least after 1950? Does he know that there claimed history is false?

Unfortunately, there are no books written about all this but even within the BKWSU changes are being made. Does he really believe that is the way "God" works?

Does he travel at all?
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ex.brahma

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post09 Nov 2012

This Forum has provided the facility to re-email the published posts.

Choose posts which you think would appeal and be convincing to your friend, such as "Why I cannot believe in 5000 years cycle", and email them one at a time to your friend personal email.

Faith is like a car tire, once punctured in a tiny place, the whole tire will deflate ... BK faith is very fragile and would not be very difficult to puncture it in so many areas.

Good luck.
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ex-l

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post09 Nov 2012

Good point. It is the envelope logo up in the top right hand corner. See below:

how_to_email.jpg
To email this post, click the envelope in the top right hand corner of the page.
how_to_email.jpg (23.67 KiB) Viewed 7158 times

On thing to point out to a male is that there is essentially no future in BKism, by that I don't just mean the future is "Destruction" ... the End of the World and the death of 7 billion human beings which the BKs will inspire ... but personally and professionally there is no future, no career path, no security, no advancement.

Brahma Kumariism is basically an expense account or indulgence. You spend your money and time and life on them ... they soak it up, live off and progress socially ... but at the end of it you have nothing except some ghost's promise that in the next world you will have a high status and live in palaces of gold.

The Brahma Kumaris have lived of making their followers believe that the world is going to end in "two or three years" since the 1930s. It's always the same ... just long enough away that no signs of Destruction are present but near enough to frighten people into gambling two or three years "just in case".

When I was a BK, the god of the BKs used to say "Destruction is 50 years and Creation (of heaven on earth) is 50 years" and it would start in 2036 ... and so Destruction was meant to happen 25 years ago!!! The leaders removed that line from the Murli lessons.

Before that I discovered that this 100 year long "Confluence Age" or Sangum Yuga was said by the leaders to be only 40 years and end in 1976. The leaders removed that too.

Then I discovered they used to say it was 14 years, and end in 1950. The leaders removed that as well. And before that, they thought it was World War II.

So they induce young people to throw their lives away and not think of their old age and who will look after them, their careers and families ... on the threat of an End of the World that never comes. Don't be fooled by their advertising. The BKs are about two things ... a fake End of the World and all sorts of silly promises that afterwards they are going to be rewarded with gold and jewels and swan shaped flying machines, and living in palaces surrounded with servants.

In your case, it suspect it will be difficult because his parents are enculted as well. I guess he will be further conflicted by their influence, subtle or gross manipulation. But he has to shake his head clear of them.

Elsewhere I likened BKism to a drug and it is like that. It can give some people a pleasant "high" for some time and it is quite addictive to give up depending on deep into you it has gotten. The best way is total separation from it and to keep busy in something else practical, to stop them spacing out into their trance. It will take his will too.

We have many old pieces of BK literature on this website that prove this re-writing of history.

40_years_Confluence_Age-bkinfo.jpg
Confluence Age 40 years
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Suganthi

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post10 Nov 2012

Thanks a lot for your help...

Answering to ex-I question, he has been in Brahma Kumaris for 10 years. But he wasn't that active until early 2012. He cannot even remember what is Om Mandali. His Father is the most influential person in this matter. From the way his mother respond to me, I can understand that she too dislike that his Father is into BK. And what surprises me more is that his mum doesn't even believe that BK camp's teach about celibacy. He is just 20 and he doesn't travel. He is an excellent student who is now pursuing a degree in Engineering. I am sad thinking how he going to end up later on in life. And I am sure he doesn't even know about any of early history of BK. I am sure he will be surprised that lord Shiva was mentioned only after 1950. Is there any appealing and convincing evidence on this?

And just to inform BK are really growing stronger in Malaysia. They are doing their talk in temples and even in famous shopping complexes. I am really upset that BK teach him that babies are karma. How foolish it can be? A baby is a gift from god. I wonder if the BKs knew this. It is really devastating that the name of God is being used by the BKs to do such evil acts. And I cannot understand how can even he believe on something foolish and illogical like this. I am more devastated knowing that I couldn't help to create any awareness among Malaysian on this subject. I don't even think any Malaysian ever come up and voice out against BK until now.

I am doing my degree now and this problem has really take a toll on my life and studies. I thank for all of your help. Hope one day the truth will come into the light.

Thanks a lot.
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ex-l

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Re: I am in a relationship with a BK

Post11 Nov 2012

Suganthi,

in the Library section there are three early posters, dated to the 1930s and 40s, called
None of them show or mention Shiva, only Lekhraj Kirpalani as "Prajapati God Brahma". There is also a book they produced called "Is This Justice?", again no mention of Shiva. We have researched this and the version of history that they tell later has been fabricated from the 1950s onwards. The "official history" is false.

Perhaps the mother is the person to be telling this.

Is it a surprise to hear of the BKs going to rich shopping malls? Of course not ... wherever there is money, you will find them.

Yes, I am sorry we cannot do anything to help in countries such as your own, and you must consider your studies first and foremost.

What is the Father like to talk to? I find most BKs completely blocked, they are programmed not to react and not to listen only to broadcast their publicity. I think it feeds their egos because they can become like mini-gurus. Obviously the Father has a lot of influence on the son. They also split families in this way to.

Yes, the Brahma Kumari are run by a lot of anti-child old ladies who either let their own child die (Dadi Janki), or left their babies behind when they left other families (Lekhraj Kirpalani's daughter, Dr Hansa Raval and others), have advised young women to have abortions, (Janki and Jayanti Kripalani) ... and yet their religion continues to 'steal' other families' children to make it expand because their god does not let them produce their own because they are a "distraction" to them, breaking the adherents' love and thinking about him.

Their god and leaders teach women that they should take the love they should have for children and treat their invisible god as their baby.

All of this is justified on the basis of "Destruction" coming in two to three years time ... and they have been saying that for 70 odd years, even changing the words in their scriptures to cover up their god's failures.

What do you think of the idea of speaking to the mother and telling of these things? Telling her that there are many BKs who have seen through the religion and are speaking out about abuses within it?

The son should have a chance to experience life first before being sucked up in a cult. This talk of "seeing you like a Sister" is straight out of the BK's training. I guess he still likes you but they are winning over his mind. To the BKs, worldly love is impure and "attachment" (feelings/loyalty/friendship with another person) is a sin and an "obstacle". They demand that their followers "have all relationships with their Baba".

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