prosheen wrote: Yes, that is true for many BKs but again we should also be careful and watchful of our own behaviour.
Who are you to say what we SHOULD OR SHOULDN'T BE SAYING OR DOING OR SHARING?
These type of words SHOULD OR SHOULDN'T DO THIS; MUST OR MUSTN'T DO THIS, are all words that instil fear in our lives. No human being has a right to impose what I should or shouldn't be doing. I have choice; I have freedom; I have boundaries; I have a voice; I am human; I am allowed to express my emotions and feelings; I am allowed to be angry if I need to ... THIS IS ALL PART OF THE REAL DYNAMICS OF BEING HUMAN AND OF LIFE ON EARTH.
God has put us on this planet to live, share, express, feel, touch, love, care, discuss, have opinions, disagreements, agreements etc and not to live a life in a bubble like a Brahma Kumari/Kumari. The life of a Brahma Kumar/Kumari is a life of a pseudo personality. It is not the life of the real innate being that is within all of us. I am a living proof of having been indoctrinated by the Brahma Kumaris since childhood and having lost touch with my innate being. None of this was healthy education for a growing child or even an adult in my opinion. It is a completely and utterly narrow minded way of living and it makes one extremely rigid, paranoid, sad, unhappy and unreal. All these must/should/have to/mustn't/shouldn't etc is a load of NONSENSE in my opinion.
A healthy relationship of any kind on this planet is one that is an Adult to Adult relationship as described in this article on Transactional Analysis:
Transactional Analysis
Each person is made up of three alter ego states: Parent, Adult, Child. These terms have different definitions than in normal language.
Parent
Physical - angry or impatient body-language and expressions, finger-pointing, patronising gestures,
Verbal - always, never, for once and for all, judgmental words, critical words, patronising language, posturing language.
N.B. beware of cultural differences in body-language or emphases that appear 'Parental'.
Child
Physical - emotionally sad expressions, despair, temper tantrums, whining voice, rolling eyes, shrugging shoulders, teasing, delight, laughter, speaking behind hand, raising hand to speak, squirming and giggling.
Verbal - baby talk, I wish, I dunno, I want, I am gonna, I don't care, oh no, not again, things never go right for me, worst day of my life, bigger, biggest, best, many superlatives, words to impress.
Adult
Physical - attentive, interested, straight-forward, tilted head, non-threatening and non-threatened.
Verbal - why, what, how, who, where and when, how much, in what way, comparative expressions, reasoned statements, true, false, probably, possibly, I think, I realise, I see, I believe, in my opinion.