16 Aug 2014
There are a numerous of quite separate questions in what you are asking, yankee.
Is masturbation allowed for a Brahma Kumar? Strictly speaking, no. It means you have failed, won't go to the Golden Age, won't become a first birth deity, won't earn a high status, will be a servant rather than a king etc ...
Is any of that true? Probably not. It's just a way of the Brahma Kumaris controlling and manipulating you.
Celibacy, brahmacharya, within the Brahma Kumaris means absolutely no sexual contact, stimulation or expression at all, for life, forever. Far more than that, it means no thought or feeling of it inside.
Is that something worth striving for? It is useful or important to your life ... probably not ... therefore the questions arise, do you really want to be a a Brahma Kumar and why do you want to be a Brahma Kumar?
I think we need to start with that.
On the other hand, if you just want to stop masturbating for your own sake, that is a different question. Sexual urges can come and go. You don't have to act upon them. Masturbation is just a habit and you can control or stop it if you want, for your own good. You don't need to masturbate, the body can maintain itself without you masturbating. And what the lessons on Sanskars teaches is that the more you do something, the strong the urge or habit becomes and the more difficult it will be to break it. Therefore, if you want to stop it, the secret is just stopping it ... even if it mean you have to stay away all night, have cold showers, go for a run, tie your hands to the top of the bed, keep the light on and keep a picture of Dadi Janki by your bedside to watch you. You can find your own way to do so.
At some point you just have to "break the horse", the run away desire and every time you don't do it, that desire will become less.
It might be good to ask, "why do you want to?" though. What is it you crave? Is it love and affection? Is it the touch of another human being? Or it is just for de-stressing and getting to sleep? Have you asked this question honestly? It's only if you start from being honest with yourself that you can work out the direction of your life.
We will not just you as bad. In fact, as Mr Green has mentioned more than one, many BKs do, they are just not honest about it. Mr Green used to be a surrendered Brother for many years. Who knows how many BKs do, some BKs even have secret marriages and sexual affairs. Even centers-in-charge.
There is, I think, a danger in that. BKism will make you feel bad, weak, impure, a failure etc. If you carry on with BKism, and masturbating, your feeling of self-worth will drop. You will feel like a hypocrite and be unable to tell others to follow a path you cannot.
In such cases, Baba says in the Murli, "it is better to get married then burn in lust". Perhaps you are just not ready for BKism and you ought to follow the family path.
Personally, I would suggest that you take a break from BKism until you can work this out because by masturbating you will be sending out the wrong sort of vibrations.
As a non-BKs it is your choice. It is good not to waste your time and energy on masturbating and spend it on other things. That was the traditional idea behind brahmacharya ... it was a time to focus your mind on study and self-development.
But that you do want to suggests something in your life is out of balance, e.g. you have a strong libido (physical drive) and are not using and expressing it, or that you have a lot of worry and stress and are just want to silence it and fall asleep by having an orgasm. I don't know your answer ... you would have to think and be honest with yourself about it. If you want to tell us and talk about it, then you can do so here.
Ultimately, BKism is not the right place for it or even addressing such topics. They just have one answer, "Do more Yoga?". It means they don't know.
Why did you want to become a BK? How did you get involved and for how long?
Excuse me for asking but are you in India, or somewhere else?
