- Posts: 104
- Joined: 19 Mar 2012
What do you do for a living?
Whatever I am today is because I have built strong support systems around me. Family is a must ... be open to possibilities of a loving companion ... you can always heal the crazy ones. Go for your breed ...
I, personally, feel your abuse at London was due to the authoritarian approach of Dadi Janki which might have been passed on to next generation ... whereas in Mount Abu Dadi Prakashmani nurtured BKs with love and mercy.
About partnership choice, in my humble opinion, 'opposites attract' is for partners/lovers who complement each other 'birds of a feather flock together' is for friendship/siblings.
So since you have quite strong defensive instincts, I, personally, feel having a vulnerable/crazy partner to start with will heal your ego and you can heal her too with your love.
In 2007, I read a book on Ramtha. In that he said he would caress us as a breeze whenever we want to feel his presence ... I called him and 'really' a breeze came.
In 2009 April, there were some meetings ... I was drowned in guilt ... rain gods would bless me with rain ... it was very strange to me how deep the bond was.
In the midst of all this drama, I don't know when but I developed a hatred towards men ... this was the main reason for delaying marriage.
My mom identified this and told this to one of the healers I visited ... she said the BKs are against sex and, hence, tell students to be away from men and she absorbed it deeply and developed hatred against all men ... that healer said I knew about BKs, but I think you only misunderstood them. Their founder itself was a man and they refer to male BKs as Brothers. but I did not have any blood Brother so the concept of Brother is only theoritical to me ... I hated all ..
I had very low expectations ... I just needed some vibrations that wouldn't result in vaginal discharge ... maybe my chakras weren't sealed ... they were oozing and bleeding all the time ... I was clueless of what was going on with me. This was from ~2008 to 2012 ... time heals many wounds.
A tenent kissed me in my childhood ... I was around 10 years then ... he was ~20 ... it was definetely not consensual ... he was left scotfree ... maybe from that time onwards I was only attracted to mean guys, those who have clear boundaries ... the selfless saints bore me ... I, being a no nonsense girl, wanted a similar companion.
I am a connoisseur of human beauty, not just physical but also about grace, elegance, speech, emotional responses, expressions, valour. Infact, everything human and people with beauty &/ brains &/ heart are a total turn on ... but I prefer subtle to gross ... though I understand gross is a bickering of loneliness, I feel the enigma is in the packaging rather than the actual product ... so this love of art also had a major role in my recovery.
What is your take on Osho (Rajneesh Jain) and his school of thought vs BKs ... compare & contrast?
Also you have mentioned that you practised mediumship/channeling ... can you please share your experiences?
Also there was an ex-BK member called Jann, what are her whereabouts? Is she of your age group? Does she live in london? Is she married?
Whatever I am today is because I have built strong support systems around me. Family is a must ... be open to possibilities of a loving companion ... you can always heal the crazy ones. Go for your breed ...
I, personally, feel your abuse at London was due to the authoritarian approach of Dadi Janki which might have been passed on to next generation ... whereas in Mount Abu Dadi Prakashmani nurtured BKs with love and mercy.
About partnership choice, in my humble opinion, 'opposites attract' is for partners/lovers who complement each other 'birds of a feather flock together' is for friendship/siblings.
So since you have quite strong defensive instincts, I, personally, feel having a vulnerable/crazy partner to start with will heal your ego and you can heal her too with your love.
In 2007, I read a book on Ramtha. In that he said he would caress us as a breeze whenever we want to feel his presence ... I called him and 'really' a breeze came.
In 2009 April, there were some meetings ... I was drowned in guilt ... rain gods would bless me with rain ... it was very strange to me how deep the bond was.
In the midst of all this drama, I don't know when but I developed a hatred towards men ... this was the main reason for delaying marriage.
My mom identified this and told this to one of the healers I visited ... she said the BKs are against sex and, hence, tell students to be away from men and she absorbed it deeply and developed hatred against all men ... that healer said I knew about BKs, but I think you only misunderstood them. Their founder itself was a man and they refer to male BKs as Brothers. but I did not have any blood Brother so the concept of Brother is only theoritical to me ... I hated all ..
I had very low expectations ... I just needed some vibrations that wouldn't result in vaginal discharge ... maybe my chakras weren't sealed ... they were oozing and bleeding all the time ... I was clueless of what was going on with me. This was from ~2008 to 2012 ... time heals many wounds.
A tenent kissed me in my childhood ... I was around 10 years then ... he was ~20 ... it was definetely not consensual ... he was left scotfree ... maybe from that time onwards I was only attracted to mean guys, those who have clear boundaries ... the selfless saints bore me ... I, being a no nonsense girl, wanted a similar companion.
I am a connoisseur of human beauty, not just physical but also about grace, elegance, speech, emotional responses, expressions, valour. Infact, everything human and people with beauty &/ brains &/ heart are a total turn on ... but I prefer subtle to gross ... though I understand gross is a bickering of loneliness, I feel the enigma is in the packaging rather than the actual product ... so this love of art also had a major role in my recovery.
What is your take on Osho (Rajneesh Jain) and his school of thought vs BKs ... compare & contrast?
Also you have mentioned that you practised mediumship/channeling ... can you please share your experiences?
Also there was an ex-BK member called Jann, what are her whereabouts? Is she of your age group? Does she live in london? Is she married?