- Posts: 28
- Joined: 25 Oct 2015
Find something else to teach and teach it voluntarily, e.g. your language to immigrants, something with children etc, or join an amateur theatre group to act ... then check to see how much the "high" is just a nature high of being need and appreciated, and how much is really a "cosmic" high of the nature the BKs claim.
Pick a fabric dye and throw all clothes in the washing machine with it. Something bright and chearful! Pink or orange. Go crazy with it. (Personally, I am a kind of blue individual but each to their own).
Do something that *really* breaks the Maryadas so you cannot go back ... and then just rough it out cold turkey.
You need to find something else to replace the hole BKism fills. Something down to earth, "of you", that you are in control off and you reap the reward of. Stop giving yourself over to some numinous other.
I remember you saying that love affairs were off the menu, as far as you are concerned. That is a shame. Well, if you cannot fall in love and make love with another human, try working with animals, or rescuing a puppy from a shelter or something. Something that will love you back without any of the "head stuff" involved with BKism.
(I don't know where you live, some cultures have public orphanages and much need and love back in volunteering there).
Be human. There's plenty of good to do.
Or destroy your BK self in style. Drink a bottle of whiskey on the guddhi and fall off it drunk, or something. Come in rolling drunk and be sick. Trust me, it will work and soon they will be locking the door to keep you out!
Have fun with it.